Game of Thrones Quotes from Season 1

Tyrion: Let me give you some advice bastard. Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.
Jon: What the hell do you know about being a bastard?
Tyrion: All dwarfs are bastards in their father's eyes.

Ned: You understand why I did it.
Bran: John said he was a deserter.
Ned: But you understand why I had to kill him.
Bran: Our way is the old way.
Ned: The man who passes the sentence should swing the sword.
Jaime: Tell me you're not thinking of taking The Black.
Tyrion: And go celibate? The whores would go begging from Casterly Rock. I just want to stand on the edge and piss off the end of the world.
Ned: War was easier than daughters.

Tyrion: And how do a bear's balls taste?
Yoren: A bit chewy. What about you, milord. What's the strangest thing you've eaten?
Tyrion: Do Dornish girls count?

Old Nan: Oh, my sweet summer child! What do you know about fear? Fear is for the winter, when the snows fall a hundred feet deep; fear is for the Long Night, when the sun hides for years and children are born and live and die all in darkness. That is the time for fear, my little Lord.

Tyrion: Where do I begin, my lords and ladies? I am a vile man, I confess it. My crimes and sins are beyond counting. I have lied and cheated, gambled and whored. I'm not particularly good at violence, but I'm good at convincing others to do violence for me. You want specifics, I suppose. When I was seven, I saw a servant girl bathing in the river. I stile her robe and she was forced to return to the castle naked and in tears. I closed my eyes, but I could still see her tits bouncing. When I was 10, I stuffed my uncle's boots with goat sh*t. When confronted with my crime, I blamed a squire. Poor boy was flogged, and I escaped justice. When I was 12 I milked my eel into a pot of turtle stew. I flogged the one-eyed snake, I skinned my sausage. I made the bald men cry into the turtle stew, which I believe my sister ate. At least I hope she did. I once brought a jackass and a honeycomb into a brothel....

Tyrion: Let's play a new game.
Bronn: There's a ... knife game I can teach ya.
Tyrion: Does it involve the potential loss of fingers?
Bronn: Not if you win.

Shaggar: How would you like to die, Tyrion, son of Tywin?
Tyrion: In my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly full of wine and a girls mouth around my cock.

Tyrion: A mind needs books like a sword needs whetstone.

 Syrio Forel : Do you pray to the Gods?
Arya: The Old and the New.
Syrio Forel: There is only one God, and his name is death. And there is only one thing we say to death: "Not today."

Jaime: There are no men like me. Only me.

Joffrey: I'll tell you what. I'm going to give you a present. After I raise my armies, and kill your traitor brother, I'll give you his head as well.
Sansa: Or maybe he'll give me yours.

Khal Drogo: I will not have your body burned. I will not give you that honor. The beetles will feed on your eyes. The worms will crawl through your lungs. The rain will fall on your rotting skin...until nothing is left of you but bones. 
Mago: First you have to kill me.
Khal Drogo: I already have. 

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